Last Sunday, I read a column in the NY Times with the provocative title We Aren’t Just Watching the Decline of the Oscars. We’re Watching the End of the Movies. As a film buff and low-key contrarian, I knew what I had to do. We skipped the Oscars and went to our local multiplex to…
Category Archives: Blog
The caller ID on my phone told me someone named Scam Likely was calling. Scam Likely calls twice a day, sometimes more. But we haven’t spoken in years due to a falling out over a scheming Nigerian Prince. I should ignore Scam Likely, but I miss that fraudulent fucker. “Hello,” I said. “Hello, my name…
Photo by Nguyen Dang Hoang Nhu on Unsplash Everyday I’m hustlin’, just like Rick Ross. But one recent overcast Monday morning I was hustlin’ so hard I arrived at the Post Office ten minutes before it opened. My immediate instinct was to kill time. But how? Those ten minutes weren’t going to kill themselves, not…
THE VIRUS IS GONE & I WENT VIRAL After 14 days with a mild(ish) case of Covid, I’m feeling better and testing negative! A big THANK YOU to everyone who reached out with get-well-soon messages and home remedies. In unrelated, but remarkably coincidental viral news, the literary hero of my dreams retweeted me, and now…
I have Covid. I’ll be OK, but as you can imagine Covid puts a damper on writing Situation Normal. For one thing, I’m quarantining, which limits my interactions with the oddballs, scammers, kind strangers, and dip-shits I rely on for inspiration. Another thing, I feel like crap, and it’s difficult to write when you feel…
Sarah Palin once said, “polls are for strippers and cross country skiers.” Well, I don’t ski, and my stripping days are a distant memory of glitter bombs and champagne promises. But I believe in polls, especially when the pollsters have the good sense to call me. One of those smart pollsters called just after dinner…
It was late in the afternoon, too late to write another word, but too early to start making dinner. So, I put on a podcast where two comedians discuss and debunk Bigfoot sightings, while I did some chores. After the bathrooms had been cleaned, and the living room tidied, I brought in the mail. Today’s…
A Western Bagel store on a Sunday morning is a tenderfoot rodeo. The lines are long and unruly. The tenderfoots come for the bagels, and they make tenderfoot mistakes like ordering chocolate chip bagels and tubs of strawberry cream cheese. But that’s their problem. My problem is tenderfoots can delay my bagel consumption by up…
A QUICK PROGRAMMING NOTE I’m going on vacation to an undisclosed location, so Situation Normal will be on hiatus for the next two weeks. I’ll return June 26 with new stories from the road! TIME FOR THE STORY 👇 Like tens of millions of people around the world, Christina and I felt the need, the…